February 8, 2003
A warm welcome to all new and continuing readers! Glad to have
you with us and we hope you enjoy this issue of “Just For
Your Participation Counts
find several sections where you can participate in this newsletter
by sharing your inspiration (see Your Favorite
Quote), give other readers a chance to know who you are and
what you do (see Reader Profile) and place
a Free ad for your business (see The Marketplace).
Do take advantage of these opportunities to connect with other
The Great Experiment III
"I was once asked why
I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I
will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally,
I'll be there." - Mother Teresa
Please go to The
Great Experiment and see the awesome flash movie. The Great
Experiment starts around the world on February 9 at noon New York
time (9 AM Pacific, 5 PM London) when millions of people around
the world will focus their prayers of peace, sending a wave of
healing energy to the governments of both the US and Iraq.
The title is "The Great Experiment III; Living and Praying
Peace." This is the third time they have organized such an
event. The first two were apparently successful efforts: hundreds
of thousands (possibly millions) of people focused their energies
and prayed. The result was sudden de-escalation of hostilities.
You can join millions of people who'll spend February
9th giving peace and compassion to everyone they meet. Let it
be an active prayer you live all day long, enjoying your peaceful
and compassionate actions and interactions with others.
Go out of your way to bring smiles to others, and set the intention
for the energy of this living prayer. It's that simple. Then at
the same time (depending on your time zone) on February 9, join
together to focus our prayers of peace, sending healing light
to dissolve all negative energies that could lead to war.
When you go to The
Great Experiment, one of the items you’ll notice is
registration for a Free 4 week course called “The Spoonbenders
Course’ where you will learn meditation techniques that
will enable you to bend a spoon with your mind. The teachers say,
…”this course should enable you to bend a spoon with
your mind in three weeks, then apply the same technology to bending
the whole world toward peace.” And they ask, “If we
can bend spoons with our minds, why can’t our prayers bring
peace?” Indeed, why not?
Valentine’s Day Wishes
Valentine’s Day is a perfect time to
express your love to family and friends and all special people
we choose to keep in our lives. I invite you to send “Some
Things We Keep…” to the “keepers” in your
life! Thank you to cousin Mercia Martich for sending this to me.
Things We Keep...
I grew up in the fifties
with practical parents -- a
Mother, God love her, who washed aluminum foil
after she cooked in it, then reused it. She was the
original recycle queen, before they had a name for it...
A Father who was happier getting old shoes fixed
than buying new ones.
Their marriage was good, their dreams focused.
Their best friends lived barely a wave away. I can
see them now, Dad in trousers, tee shirt and a hat
and Mom in a house dress, lawn mower in one hand,
dishtowel in the other.
It was the time for fixing things -- a curtain rod,
the kitchen radio, screen door, the oven door, the hem
in a dress. Things we keep.
It was a way of life, and sometimes it made me
All that re-fixing, reheating, renewing, I wanted
just once to be wasteful.
Waste meant affluence. Throwing things away meant
there'd always be more.
But then my Mother died, and on that clear summer's
night, in the warmth of the hospital room, I was
struck with the pain of learning that sometimes
there isn't any 'more.'
Sometimes, what we care about most gets all used up
and goes away...never to return.
So...while we have it...it's best we love it.....and
care for it.....and fix it when it's broken.....and
heal it when it's sick.
This is true...for marriage...and old
cars...and children with bad report cards...and
dogs with bad hips...and aging parents...and grandparents.
We keep them because they are worth it, because we
are worth it.
Some things we keep.
Like a best friend that moved away -- or -- a
classmate we grew up with.
There are just some things that make life important,
like people we know who are special...and so, we keep
Now send this to all those people that are "keepers"
in your life...like you!!
Vote for us because your vote matters :)
I just noticed we only have 1 vote listed for JFY
(and thank you for the top vote)! Please, your vote does matter
because it tells others about this newsletter. Vote for us at
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For great Free Valentine’s Day cards, see
The little gem below is more of a story-in-dialogue rather than
an article but it seems appropriate as we head toward Valentine’s
Day. Communication can be challenging in any context but between
men and women communication has it’s own unique twists and
turns. Thanks to reader Al
Mierau for sending this.
Difference Between Men and Women”
Let's say a guy named Fred is attracted to a woman
named Martha. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts;
they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he
asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves.
They continue to see each other regularly, and after
a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.
And then, one evening when they're driving home, a
thought occurs to Martha, and, without really thinking,
she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of
tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six
And then, there is silence in the car.
To Martha, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks
to herself: I wonder if it bothers him that I said that.
Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship;
maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind
of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.
And Fred is thinking: Gosh. Six months.
Martha is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want
this kind of relationship either. Sometimes I wish I
had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about
whether I really want us to keep going the way we are,
moving steadily towards, I mean, where are we going?
Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this
level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward
children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for
that level of commitment? Do I really even know this
And Fred is thinking: ...so that means it was...let's
see...February when we started going out, which was
right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means...lemme
check the odometer...Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil
And Martha is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on
his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe
he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy,
more commitment; maybe he has sensed - even before I
sensed it - that I was feeling some reservations. Yes,
I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say
anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being
And Fred is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look
at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons
say, it's still not shifting right. And they better
not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What
cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is
shifting like a garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent
And Martha is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame
him. I'd be angry, too. I feel so guilty, putting him
through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just
And Fred is thinking: They'll probably say it's only
a 90-day warranty...scumballs.
And Martha is thinking: Maybe I'm just too idealistic,
waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white
horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good
person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly
do care about, a person who seems to truly care about
me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered,
schoolgirl romantic fantasy.
And Fred is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty?
I'll give them a warranty. I'll take their warranty
and stick it right up their...
"Fred," Martha says aloud.
"What?" says Fred, startled.
"Please don't torture yourself like this,"
she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe
I should never have...oh dear, I feel so..."(She
breaks down, sobbing.)
"What?" says Fred.
"I'm such a fool," Martha sobs. "I mean,
I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly.
There's no knight, and there's no horse."
"There's no horse?" says Fred.
"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Martha
"No!" says Fred, glad to finally know the
"It's just that...it's that I...I need some time,"
Martha says. (There is a 15-second pause while Fred,
thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a
safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he
thinks might work.)
"Yes," he says. (Martha, deeply moved, touches
"Oh, Fred, do you really feel that way?"
"What way?" says Fred.
"That way about time," says Martha.
"Oh," says Fred. "Yes." (Martha
turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing
him to become very nervous about what she might say
next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she
"Thank you, Fred," she says.
"Thank you," says Fred.
Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a
conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas
when Fred gets back to his place, he opens a bag of
Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply
involved in a rerun of a college basketball game between
two South Dakota junior colleges that he has never heard
of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells
him that something major was going on back there in
the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would
ever understand what, and so he figures it's better
if he doesn't think about it.
The next day Martha will call her closest friend, or
perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation
for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they
will analyze everything she said and everything he said,
going over it time and time again, exploring every word,
expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering
every possible ramification.
They will continue to discuss this subject, off and
on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite
conclusions, but never getting bored with it either.
Meanwhile, Fred, while playing racquetball one day
with a mutual friend of his and Martha's, will pause
just before serving, frown, and say: "Norm, did
Martha ever own a horse?"
And that's the difference between men and women.
For great Free Valentine’s Day cards, see 123
The Countdown Is On: Only 8 More Days Till
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Are you ready for a successful relationship?
Find out by taking this Relationship Readiness Quiz For Singles
Partner Quest. You can register for their Free 5 Day email
program for singles by sending a blank email to LPQ5DayProgram@getresponse.com.
Get free excerpts from their soon-to-be published "Conscious
Dating: Finding The Love Of Your Life In Today's World"
be sending a blank email to ConsciousDating@getresponse.com.
A Portrait, Please…
perfect gift, especially for Valentine’s
Give your special person a self portrait, with a great discount
for readers of this newsletter.
This pencil portrait is of "Sara Michelle Gellar",
one of Kyle Hilton’s favorite TV celebrities. She plays
"Buffy" on the TV series "Buffy the Vampire
Now you can commission young 16-year-old artist Kyle
Hilton to draw a one-of-a-kind pencil portrait of you
or a loved one at the very special discounted 28% off available
only to readers of JFY. Just send a photo of yourself or the
person you wish to give this gift to.
See portrait samples and the special discount right here.
For Kids And Adults
Day Games and Party Ideas is a site for kids and adults
filled with games, crafts, poetry, books.
Larry James is a speaker, author and on staff with Dr. John
Gray. Larry’s site, Celebrate
Love has articles for both singles and marrieds, relationship
books, answers to relationship questions. Poke around his
site a bit and you’ll discover a host of unique items,
some on other topics. Larry was the associate producer of
the nationally syndicated "Mars & Venus" radio
talk show, has appeared on ABC’s “The View”
television show, and has been featured in numerous leading
Looking For A Love Quote?
and Inspirational Quotes for quotes on love as well as
just about any topic.
||For An Inspiring Reminder About Your Time
For Being Human” by Cherie Carter-Scott in "Chicken
Soup for the Soul"
Candy? Roses? How about giving a gift that lasts a lifetime? Tell
us what is wonderful about your love and we’ll create a gift
poem for Valentine’s Day. Only at PeoplePoems.com.
Circle of Love
In reaching out a hand of love,
To touch another heart;
A seed of love is planted,
And so the circle starts.
From that tiny seed of love,
A garden grows and blooms;
Bringing forth a flower of hope,
That shares its sweet perfume.
For every time the blossom,
Is passed from man to man;
The circle grows much stronger,
As they join hand in hand.
A never ending circle,
Will keep on touching hearts;
As long as seeds of love still bloom,
That were planted at the start.
By Allison Chambers Coxsey
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